Part III: Moving on with your life post-divorce
No matter how long you and your ex-partner were together, looking to the future post-divorce can leave you feeling a little lost or apprehensive about the next stage of your life.
Clients often come to us seeking help at the end of the divorce process, particularly as the ‘noise’ of their matrimonial proceedings has quietened, and they are not sure of what to do next or how to move on.
We have therefore created a 5-step plan to assist those entering into this new phase:
Get relevant support from professionals, friends and family
It is important to recognise that, as with the divorce process itself, sometimes you just need that extra bit of help. Whether that be from an emotional / mental health point of view, childcare support, or assistance to deal with your new financial position. No matter how big or small your issue may be, there will be someone you can reach out to for help. We have a brilliant “little black book” of people that we have worked with across all areas and would be happy to put you in touch with the right individuals to help you with this next chapter of your life.
Spend time with people you love
After a separation, you tend to find out who your real friends are – those who will show up and support you. Ensure that you spend time with the people you love and who make you feel good, and don’t be afraid to let go of the people who cause you stress, or bring you down. Equally, consider using this as an opportunity to get back in contact with people who you may have lost touch with, but remain important to you.
Be open minded
Try to be open minded to try new things, and consider accepting invitations which you would usually decline. A new experience can open doors to new hobbies, friends and memories. Our clients have also found that in doing so they feel more confident and self-sufficient.
Look to improve your overall health and wellbeing
You may find yourself feeling a little drained both physically and emotionally after your divorce has concluded. It is a good time to focus on you and improving your overall health and wellbeing. We encourage our clients to consider eating well and introducing a new exercise routine. The benefits to maintaining a healthy lifestyle are numerous, but the more you can do to boost your self-esteem, mood, sleep quality and energy, and get back to feeling good, the better.
Create an action plan for the next 6 months
Try to envisage where you realistically want to be in 6 months’ time and create an action plan to help you move towards that goal. This does not have to be a dramatic plan – sometimes it is making a list of books you want to read or expanding your social circle. Visualising your future can be overwhelming, so small, attainable goals are best to keep you on track and motivated at the beginning.